Ask Lafeber

My cockatiels scream at my partner when I’m not around!

Hi, I have 2 male cockatiels, Whistle is just over a year old and Jax is about a year old. My partner and I just moved into our own house, but we have been living together for 6 months at my parents house previous to moving here, my birds have always screamed no matter what I do to try and keep them occupied (think it’s hormome related) , with foraging toys, and actives to keep them busy. Since moving here when I need to go out or am not at home my partner always has to leave the house because the screaming gets bad (according to him) i didn’t believe him and told him to stop being silly it’s just how the birds are they make noise we can’t expect them to be quiet, fortunately for me I got to experience this screaming he was talking about when the birds thought I was still out, it was horrific, they sounded like they were going to die if I didn’t come home ?. On another note I like to go out in the mornings for about an hour while they eat their chop, it’s kind of our routine after I feed them I leave and go run errands etc, when I return (this is when my partner is at work) I sit in my car for a bit and they make not one noise, they only do it when he’s home by himself . Why is this happening? And how can I fix this issue ?. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3.5 years now and he’s not a massive fan of my birds due to this behavioural issue they have with him, I’ve tried making him give them treats through the cage etc when they are quiet (when I’m out) and they refuse to take the treat from him or try to bite him. I understand not everyone is a bird person but I’d like my family to live together peacefully, I feel as though I cannot leave the house when my partners home anymore, which also throws my birds off their routine as well. Sorry if this is hard to understand, I’ve done alot of research on parrots and hormones, one of my
Birds has terrible hormonal issues all year round and gets triggered by a lot of our house hold objects, so it’s been an adventure trying to figure him out as well.

It makes it hard for people to understand why I love these little birds so much when they are only well behaved around myself, they generally act like this when others are around.

Hi Jessica,

At around a year old, your birds are barely considered adults, so they can’t have been hormonal all this time. Some of this is just being young, immature birds. They are now at the age where they are experiencing hormones for the first time, even though they should not breed until they are at least 2 years old. Even though you have 2 males, as long as they share a cage, their bond will get stronger, and the day will come where neither bird will remain tame to anyone. There can be some exceptions, but I think a lot of the issues here are having 2 birds in the same cage, and trying to keep them as tame pets. Yes, they can be loud, but most vocalizing is to call to each other or to their human. They can also alarm call, and that sounds like what they are doing around your boyfriend. It’s possible he has shouted at them, or thrown something at the cage – let’s face it, we all want to do that at times. But since birds are prey animals, any negative actions towards them will cause them to lose trust. They do not like or trust your boyfriend. Even if he hasn’t done anything to try to get them to stop, you are asking too much of them to expect them to live together, and remain tame with you, and be tame to yet another person. Adult birds only have one mate or companion. They bond with one bird, and no longer have physical contact with other flock members. So while they have done OK living together to this point, they are now becoming mature, and bonding to each other, and feeling confused because you want them to also be tame with you and your boyfriend. This is too much to expect. Yes, there can be exceptions, but from the sounds of it, these birds are turning more to each other each day. I’m not sure that there is a solution that allows you to keep them both in the same cage, and still be able to handle them, and not expect them to be loud. It’s hard enough to get one bird to learn not to scream, but two is a huge challenge. Birds do not respond to negative reinforcement – all it does is destroy their trust in humans. You have to ignore screaming and not give them attention until they stop. Since they have no bond with your boyfriend, they don’t care if he ignores them. And if their bond fades with you, same thing.

Now I have said all of this assuming the share a cage. If they are each in their own cage, then they are simply egging each other on. Owners make the mistake all the time of thinking if they get another bird, their bird won’t be so loud. Instead you get twice the noise because they either communicate with each other, or they compete. So again, you have a difficult situation. The only way you will progress in minimizing the noise is for everyone to cooperate. When they scream, you have to leave the room without saying anything to them. If they stop even for a minute, go back and praise them and give them a treat. This can be a long process, and again, everyone has to be committed to the process. If you give in just one time, it will undo any progress you have made. Since these guys have been doing this for a long time, it will take as long to get them to stop. And again, they may not. You have a love square here. LOL They like each other, and are probably jealous when you handle one or the other. And they are most certainly jealous when you give your boyfriend attention. Your boyfriend is jealous of the birds – the don’t like him, and they harass and annoy him – by his perspective. Nothing they do is personal. Their instinct is to have one close companion. We put pet birds in confusing situations when we want them to like us, and another bird. They can’t fight their instinct – it’s nature. Maybe understanding more about the “why” will help you out here.

Thank you for asking Lafeber,

Brenda